The last song on this CD is actually the first song I created for the Kickstarter song-level donors back in the summer of 2012 (which ended up being the only song of those I created until I got off my butt and did the other 9 this month for FAWM). A parody of "Kyle, Are You Ian?" by Scooter Picnic, and it's follow up "Devo, Are You ShoEboX?" by Devo Spice and Worm Quartet, Carrie Dahlby decided she wanted us to get in on the inside joke FuMP meme, and asked me if I would write this for us as her donor song to post at theFuMP.com, which we did under her account on July 31st, 2012. I later released the studio version of song on my B-sides collection, "What A Ripoff! Volume 3". This version is a recording of the first time we performed it live on stage, at LukeSkiCon 2013, featuring live cameos from Carrie's husband Josh, and my wife Sara.
lyrics
1st Verse/Chorus:
Luke:
People know me as the great Luke Ski.
I TiVo every animated program on T.V.
When it comes to plugging stuff I have no concept of discretion,
(as Gilbert:) And I do an annoying Gilbert Gottfried impression.
I've got more action figures than Demento's got wax.
Won a Logan Award. Not braggin', check the facts.
The only act with more year-end number ones than I
is, you know, what's-his-name, that architect guy.
Now lately the FuMP dot com has been ravaged
by an 80's movie curse, like “Vice Versa's” Fred Savage,
or Kirk Cameron in “Like Father, Like Son”.
Remember that?... ...Nope. I'm the only one.
First Kyle switched with Ian, then ShoEboX with Devo.
That kind of thing surely won't happen to me though,
but if it did happen I'm thinking I'd probably
end up switching places with my friend, Carrie Dahlby.
Carrie: Luke, are you Carrie? Luke: Carrie, are you Luke?
Carrie: Luke, are you Carrie? Luke: Carrie, are you Luke?
Carrie: Do you prefer Steely Dan, or that Humpty Hump kook?
So Luke, are you Carrie? Luke: Carrie, are you Luke?
Carrie, are you Luke? Carrie: Luke, are you Carrie?
Luke: Carrie, are you Luke? Carrie: Luke, are you Carrie?
Luke: “Did you ever do a scene in an apothecary?”
Carrie, are you Luke? Carrie: Luke, are you Carrie?
(spoken:)
Luke: If you think I'm going to rhyme my name with 'puke' in this song, you're sorely mistaken. Moving on...
2nd Verse/Chorus:
Carrie: At 6 a.m., I'm a sleep walking zombie.
A first time mommy, it's me Carrie Dahlby.
The only main FuMPer to experience pregnancy.
I toss out kids LIKE I TOSS OUT HARMONIES!
I love baby Alex even more than the Beatles,
And at NEIU, I sing opera for reals.
Everything's a song, as you can plainly see,
and the world is made of guys just like Luke Ski.
We've both done cat songs, not so perplexing.
Mine were short and sweet, his were martian and sexy.
We've been to the Dells, Comicon, and more,
and we're BFFs, despite our Bad Rapport. (Luke: Plug!)
Luke is the world's biggest Muppet Show fan.
I mean I like 'em too, but holy crap, man!
Won't shut up about MarsCon if you get him on a roll.
I'm a middle east country, he's a mountain troll!
Luke: Luke, are you Carrie? Carrie: Carrie, are you Luke?
Luke: Luke, are you Carrie? Carrie: Carrie, are you Luke?
Luke: Have you drawn caricatures at a prom in Dubuque?
So Luke, are you Carrie? Carrie: Carrie, are you Luke?
Carrie, are you Luke? Luke: Luke, are you Carrie?
Carrie: Carrie, are you Luke? Luke: Luke, are you Carrie?
Carrie: Is your chest doubly round, or disgustingly hairy?
So Carrie, are you Luke? Luke: Luke, are you Carrie?
(spoken:)
Carrie: Just what the FuMP needs, more meta inside joke songs. ~sigh~ Anyway...
3rd Verse:
Luke: I eat tons of bacon! Carrie: I eat healthy food like Wheaties.
Luke: I got too much stuff! Carrie: I got type two diabetes.
Luke: I can do low voices. Carrie: I can squeak like a door hinge.
Luke: She's known to wear pink. Carrie: He's known to wear orange.
Luke: Ken Sherlock's my friend. Carrie: Man, I can't live without him.
Luke: I listen to Mischke. Carrie: Yeah, I told you about him!
Luke: I love “30 Rock”. Carrie: Damn, that show is real funny.
Luke: I wrote all of this song. Carrie: And I took all of the money.
Hey, what's going on? Luke: Did the switch happen maybe?
Carrie: I'm blonde with a gut! Luke: I've got boobs and a baby!
I'll put on your cheerleader outfit from '06,
Grab my digital camera, and take some sexy pics,
email them to myself for when we switch back.
Carrie: What am I supposed to do? Luke: Well, you could hit the track.
Do that Weight Watchers thing, you were always so great.
Could you slim me down to about 188?
Carrie: Ah?! How did I get the short end of the stick?
Stuck in his body with his gigantic ego?
Luke: You can belch like a man, and it won't seem profane!
Carrie: What's this unexplained rash? Luke: Dude, I can explain.
Carrie: That's it, I give up, guess we'll call it a wash.
Now I'll go sleep with Sara, you go sleep with Josh!
Luke: What?! Not tonight! I think I'm catching a fever!
Josh: Hey, I'm not exactly thrilled about this either.
(spoken)
Sara: What's Luke plugging no-o-o-ow?
Luke: Shuuut up!
4th Verse/Chorus:
Luke: This FuMP body swappin' shows no signs of stoppin'.
Now there's Hot Waffles in the Gothsicles' coffin.
Carrie: Ookla Bubble Wrap's new song might thrill you,
Luke: “Stop Talking About PokeMon Or I'll Kill You!”
Carrie: Who are those six guys in one furry suit?
Luke: Looks like Sci-Fried is now Max DeGroot.
Carrie: Irish cat webcomics done by Marc Balder.
Luke: Peanut butter sandwich rock by Possible Schlosser.
Carrie: Kobi, are you Austin? Luke: Damsels, are you Shisho?
Carrie: Are we on the main page? Luke: Or is this on the Sideshow?
Carrie: Tom Smith is the Boobles and he likes it a lot.
Luke: Dino-Mike, are you Derwood? Dino-Mike: God, I hope not. (Derwood: Hey!)
Carrie: Toyboat Potato Chips? What a mess!
Luke: Is Jesse Smith Morning Sidekick? Jesse: Actually, yes!
Carrie: Positude Sisyphus says it all will be fine.
Luke: Consortium of Genius, are you Flat 29?
(spoken:)
Dr. Pinkerton: YOU CAN'T FAKE A CAKE ON THE MAKE!!!
Rich Green: Aw, farganargle!
(end of song)
"the great Luke Ski" is The Dr. Demento Show's most requested artist of the 21st Century. His parodies and original songs
about pop-culture have made him a favorite performer at fandom conventions all across the country. Founding member of The Funny Music Project, aka 'the FuMP' .com .
Luke Ski is an animation Storyboarder, Writer, & Voice-Over Actor.
The opinions expressed here are mine alone....more
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