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I Want To Be Steve Buscemi

from Target: Audience by the great Luke Ski

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From the FuMP .com, 5/2/2008,

Oh, Tom Smith! How may you cover my ass? Let me count the ways... Tom Smith's classic hit 'I Want To Be Peter Lorre' has been parodied countless times over the past couple decades. Back in the fall of 2004, I got the idea to take his song about the beloved bug-eyed character actor of classic cinema, Peter Lorre, and rewrite it about the beloved bug-eyed character actor of modern cinema, Steve Buscemi. I performed it a couple of times, but it has since been collecting dust in a spiral notebook in my storage room of doom. Last week some fans and friends were asking about it in the Dementia Radio chat room, which led to me asking Tom for his permission and talent in making it a reality. Tom graciously whipped up some background music for me to use... Background music which will later be improved for his forthcoming re-recorded version of 'I Want To Be Peter Lorre' as part of his 'Sounds Familiar' project which he's been posting at iTom, where you can get even more free comedy songs, just like right here at the FuMP!... Anyway, I had always hoped to have this song recorded someday, so thank you again to Tom Smith for making this track a reality.

lyrics

I Want To Be Steve Buscemi
A parody of Tom Smith's "I Want To Be Peter Lorre", about bug-eyed character actor, Steve Buscemi.
Parody lyrics by Luke Sienkowski, © 2004-2008

The curse of my existence, is the movies that I see.
And I can't do much for them, not doing very much for me.
Full of apathy and aloof, for guys like Shia Labeouf.
Patrick Dempsey and Will Ferrell's performances are bland and sterile.

Ashton Kutcher's too obnoxious, Owen Wilson is too meek.
Ben Stiller stars in movies about every other week.
Check the supporting role, for a more exquisite troll,
Whose unique look could not be hipper…
…and fits neatly into any wood chipper!

When I grow up, I wanna be Steve Buscemi.
I wanna be pale and sweaty with sneering lips.
As slimy as escargot, botch a kidnapping in Fargo,
And if I escape to L.A., I'll deliver some Tarantino quips!
I wanna woo some kooky artist goth girl.
I want an Armegeddon suicide.
The last thing that I need, is to be any kind of lead.
I want to grow up to be Steve Buscemi, and go on a 'Rocket Ride'!

When I grow up, I wanna be Steve Buscemi.
I'll wear a suit and be a gangster, smoke and drink.
This slow motion stuff ain't lame, but what is, is my assigned name.
I mean, how'm I supposed to impress or intimidate folks, with a name like 'Mr. Pink'?
I wanna be a lovable psycho-killer.
I want to grant the Spy Kids' techno wish.
I'll bowl with the Big Lebowski, and harass poor Mike Wazowski,
I wanna grow up to be Steve Buscemi, and be a really Big Fish.

[Spoken:] What do you know, it scares little kids, *and* little filkers!

When I grow up, I wanna be Steve Buscemi.
I'll go bowling with 'The Dude' up until my doom. [Jesus: Nobody fools with the Jesus!]
John Goodman goes on and on, yelling stuff about Vietnam,
While we're trying to replace the rug in his place, 'cause it really tied together the room.
I want to cameo for Adam Sandler,
Collect royalties til I'm a hundred and thirteen.
And I'll voice some cartoon guys, if they got [Lorre voice:] GREAT BIG BULGING EYES!
I want to grow up to be Steve Buscemi,
I'm gonna win an Oscar, and maybe an Emmy!
I'll be the best Steve Buscemi you've ever seen!

[Spoken:] I gave up Clown College for this?…
…Can it, Wazowski!

credits

from Target: Audience, track released May 2, 2008
Lyrics & vocals by the great Luke Ski
Music by Tom Smith

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the great Luke Ski Burbank, California

"the great Luke Ski" is The Dr. Demento Show's most requested artist of the 21st Century. His parodies and original songs about pop-culture have made him a favorite performer at fandom conventions all across the country. Founding member of The Funny Music Project, aka 'the FuMP' .com .

Luke Ski is an animation Storyboarder, Writer, & Voice-Over Actor.

The opinions expressed here are mine alone. ... more

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