From the new album by the great Luke Ski, 'Target: Audience', available on CD and for download today at Luke Ski dot com. This song would not be possible without the immense talent and awesomeness of the following people:
Music by Bob Emmett of Project Sisyphus.
Vocals, vocal interpretation, and coaching by Carrie Dahlby.
Vocals by ShoEboX of Worm Quartet.
Vocals, mixing, and mastering by Chris Mezzolesta of Power Salad.
Inspiration from the Nick Atoms. Always grave-rob from the best.
This song is about wildly popular, critically acclaimed, Sci-fi Channel series 'Battlestar Galactica', the current reimagining of the 1978 classic, done to the tune of that 'Wayne's World' song.
What? If Tom Smith can regularly refer to 'Because I Got High' by Afroman as 'the song from the closing credits of Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back', then I get to call this song 'that Wayne's World song'.
Okay, fine, you win. It's a parody of 'Bohemian Rhapsody' by Queen. Like you didn't figure that out the moment you read the title.
I really hope you like the song, because unfortunately for you, the human-disguised-cylon known as Janny-7 seduced Rob Balder into giving her access to the FuMP mainframe, which she used to launch a nuclear strike against ourselves while you've been reading this. So, enjoy the song during your final five minutes and twenty four seconds to live.
Is this the real life,
Living on Caprica.
We're protected by
The Battlestar Galactica.
To our surprise,
Look up to the skies and see…
It's the genocide, of all humanity (Ho-lo-cost)
The Cylons nuked the twelve, all to Hell.
What T.F.? F.T.L.!
Anywhere the fleet goes,
doesn't really matter to me… To me.
[Spoken:]
Adama: Send them out to the black. Tell 'em we ain't coming back.
Adama… is in command.
His son Lee Apollo's rash,
And he sometimes sports a 'stache.
Starbuck's… bean in some hot water,
But now she's in a latte trouble today.
Adama, Oo-oo-oo-oooo,
You're Olmos the man we need.
If President Roslin puts you in detention,
Carry on, carry on, 'cause you're really hot for teacher.
[Spoken:]
President Laura Roslin: Dr. Baltar! You have to write on the chalkboard,
"I will not give the Cylons access to the Colonies defense mainframe" 50,000 times!
Baltar, 'Doctor horrible',
Gets distracted by some curves,
This Gaius getting on my nerves.
Marylin Mon-robot, with eternal life.
When she dies she downloads to a Stepford Wife.
Athena… plays Helo too… (Anywhere the fleet goes)
Sharon had to cry.
Eight balled when they said baby Boomer died.
[Spoken:]
Dr. Gaius Baltar: This world is a mess, and I just need to rule it.
I see a little opera house inside my head.
There were five, dressed in white, or perhaps it was Gandalf?
Galen's gonna go nuts. Who ate all the donuts? Lee?
Lee Apollo! Lee Apollo!
Lee Apollo! Lee Apollo!
Lee Apollo ate them whole.
He's saying "D'oh!" "D'oh!" "D'oh!" "D'oh!" "D'oh!"
Three's just a skin-job, nobody loves her.
Three's just a skin-job, princess warrior.
She drives a Hybrid, a prophecizor! [Spoken:] Hybrid: 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42, end of line.
Hera is, two years old, took a little stroll.
Athena! No! The Six has got a hold. Let her go!
Athena! This vision was foretold. Let her go!
Athena! No need to go loco. Let her go!
Just saying hello. Let her go!
There I let her go.
Hera Hera Hera Hera here I go! Bam! Bang! Bingo!
One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Eight!
Adama Lee Adama Lee Adama Lee married a ho.
You hear that song? I'm a Cylon all along? FRAK me!
FRAK me!
FRAK MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
[Rockin theme to classic "Battlestar Galacitca" plays]
Will the legend called Earth ever be where we land?
Will we all be forced to repeat "By your command"?
That tears it! Should have voted for Zarek!
Right down the Hatch! He's like Dick Cheney with ethics.
[Spoken:]
Comm. Saul Tigh: Don't blame me, I fixed the election for Roslin.
Joe: Want another Margarita, salt-eye?
Oooo-oooo-oooo, FRAK yeah! FRAK yeah!
[Spoken:]
Comm. Saul Tigh: What'd you say about my eye?! That's Commander!
Show some respect for the XO!
Joe: More like the KO'ed.
Comm. Saul Tigh: Huh?!
Joe: Here's your whiskey, sir!
Comm. Saul Tigh: That's more like it.
We're all in a quorem,
Anyone can see.
Without resurrection,
Nothing FRAKKIN' matters, to me.
So say we a-all.
[Spoken:] (whispered by all) fraaaaaaak!
credits
from Target: Audience,
released August 14, 2008
Lead vocals by the great Luke Ski
Music by Bob Emmett of Project Sisyphus.
Vocals, vocal interpretation, and coaching by Carrie Dahlby.
Vocals by ShoEboX of Worm Quartet.
Vocals, mixing, and mastering by Chris Mezzolesta of Power Salad.
"the great Luke Ski" is The Dr. Demento Show's most requested artist of the 21st Century. His parodies and original songs
about pop-culture have made him a favorite performer at fandom conventions all across the country. Founding member of The Funny Music Project, aka 'the FuMP' .com .
Luke Ski is an animation Storyboarder, Writer, & Voice-Over Actor.
The opinions expressed here are mine alone....more
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