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88 Lines About 44 Simpsons

from Worst Album Ever by the great Luke Ski



A parody of "88 Lines About 44 Women" by "the Nails", about "The Simpsons".


(4 measure intro)

Willie: Now listen up! You tube-watchin' cartoon junkies!

Ralph: Lisa is a clever girl, she's got heart and lots of brains.
Krusty: Bart is a troublemaker, giving teachers headache pains.
Apu: Marge is the perfect mother, making kids a yummy sammich.
Frink: Homer is a model father, but he has no brain to damage.

(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Homer: Mmm… Donuts!
(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Homer: The what now?

Smithers: Patti runs the DMV, and has nothing to do with men.
Dr. Nick: Selma is her twin sister, two walking carcinogens.
Moe: Grampa is cantankerous, his complaints are getting bigger.
C. B. Guy: Maggie is the silent type, she's the one who pulled the trigger.

(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Barney: (*belch!*)
(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Maggie: (*suck, suck, suck, suck, suck*)

Barney: Mr. Burns is Homer's boss and bleeds Springfield just like a sieve.
Krusty: Smithers is his right hand man, his lifestyle's alternative.
Frink: Flanders is the next-door neighbor, Okely-Dokely-Doo!
Apu: Moe runs the local Tavern, he'll pour you another brew.
Smithers: Barney was a belching loser, filling up on different beers.
C. B. Guy: Milhouse looks just like that kid who used to be on "Wonder Years".
Moe: Martin is the prissy type, no one loves him but his Ma.
Mr. Burns/Nelson: Nelson is the local bully, he's the one that says "Ha-Ha!"

(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Mr. Burns: Excellent!
(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Flanders: Hidely-Ho!

Otto: Ms. Krabappel, fourth grade teacher, education is a farce.
Apu/Willie: Willie is the Scottish grounds man, he'll tell you to "Move your arse!"
Krusty: Seymour Skinner loves his mother, perfect Norman Bates hotel.
Ralph: Reverend Lovejoy is the preacher, he says we'll all burn in Hell.
C. B. Guy: Chief Wiggum and his squad make Barney Feiff look like McBain.
Frink: Marvin Monroe cured neurosis with electrodes to the brain.
Dr. Nick: Otto is the school bus driver, no one knows just what he's on.
Smithers: Kwik-E-Mart's run by Apu Nahasapeemapetilon.

(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Dr. Nick: Hi everybody!
(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Apu: Thank you, come again!

Mr. Burns: Mayor Quimby, politician, all your votes he will extort.
Smithers: Lionel Hutz, a bad attorney, he'll get you contempt of court.
Krusty: Kent Brockman reads the news with a crazy debonair.
Dr. Nick: Ralph's nosebleeds would stop if he kept his finger out of there.
C.B.Guy: Itchy is a cartoon mouse who has some violent tendencies.
Moe: Scratchy is his kitty victim, mashed him into cottage cheese.
Ralph: Krusty will get lots of laughs when he hits your head with a hammer.
Frink: Sideshow Bob's a psychopath who uses proper Kelsey grammar.

(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Krusty: Hey Hey! Hu hu huh ha!
(Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Sideshow Bob: Huh-uuh-uuh-uuh…

Otto: Jimbo is a teenage punk, lots of pranks he will be plannin'.
Dr. Nick: Sideshow Mel got a concussion when he got shot from a cannon.
Mr. Burns: Dr. Hibbert, he will treat you, fix it up and make it nice.
Apu: Dr. Nick will do it quicker, at a bargain basement price.
Willie: Cletus is a slack-jawed yokel, farming dirt to feed his kin.
Krusty: Troy McClure, a washed up actor, you can see him starring in…
Ralph: "Radioactive Man Versus Mutant Ninja Minks".
Frink/C.B.Guy: "Mmm-hoy, moisen gayne and glaiven!" Those words are Professor Frink's.
Moe: Kodos is from outer space, shows up every Halloween.
Barney: Kang is her mutant brother, laughing over earth cuisine.
Smithers/B.Man: Bumblebee Man, "No es bueno!", his pain will go on forever.
Frink/C.B.Guy: Comic Book Guy heard this disc and said "…Worst …Album …Ever"!

(Simpsons Theme plays)
Barney, Moe, & Willie: 88 Lines About 44 Simpsons!
(Finale of Simpsons Theme plays)
Homer: D'OH!
Nelson: Ha-Ha!


from Worst Album Ever, released July 26, 2003
Lyrics & Vocals by the great Luke Ski
Music & engineering: J.T. Sienkowski & Paul Hettiger




the great Luke Ski Burbank, California

"the great Luke Ski" is The Dr. Demento Show's most requested artist of the 21st Century. His parodies and original songs about pop-culture have made him a favorite performer at fandom conventions all across the country. Founding member of The Funny Music Project, aka 'the FuMP' .com .

Luke Ski is an animation Storyboarder, Writer, & Voice-Over Actor.

The opinions expressed here are mine alone.
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