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about

An original sexy hip-hop song about making up stories in your head that only serve to make you worried or upset for no good reason.

lyrics

Verse 1:
Fantasy is a state of mentality,
where you control the fabric of reality.
Just what kind of sensuality
will you envision led by your personality?
Imagination takes you higher and higher,
where you can all fulfill your every single desire.
You can go anywhere, not led by reason or rhyme,
so here’s the kind of things I fantasize all of the time.
...Walking down the sidewalk in the city,
when I see woman walking my way who is way beyond pretty.
A sexy body from her head to her toes,
so let me tell you just where my mind goes:
Oh, wow! Well she’s hot.
Take a good look at her! Then again, better not.
I don’t want her to think that I'm some kind of perv,
if she ever caught me checking out even one curve.
Now I notice that she’s not Caucasian.
She’s either Latina, or some kind of Asian.
So not only would she think it’s sexist, I’m
risking committing accidental hate crime.
Any defense I could say would be fleeting.
Hashtag Sleazebag is what they’d all be Tweeting.
I’d get crucified in a public-held trial.
It’s really not worth it, just to hope for a smile.
In just a few seconds, she’ll pass me when walking.
I’ll get out my cell phone, pretend that I’m talking.
Look up at the sky, keep averting my eyes,
Here she co- TED! HOW ARE YOU AND THE GUYS!
WANNA JAM WITH MY BAND? I COULD USE A GOOD BASSIST!
Crisis averted, I’m no creepy racist.
And much like that fictional phone guy named Ted,
all that stupid drama came from inside my head. It’s...

Chorus 1:
NEUROTICA!… It’s the stores that you write in your mind,
when good feelings are too common to find. It’s
NEUROTICA!… It’s the narratives you make in your head,
so you’re the author of your own worry and dread. It's
NEUROTICA!… It’s the over-self-disparaging plot
you just thought up whether you like it or not. It’s
NEUROTICA!…

Verse 2:
When I wake up in the morning, I get a spilt second of peace,
which will suddenly cease, my depression increase,
when like a TV recap shown in my head,
‘Here’s all the recent story arcs to make you wish you were dead:
You know that everyone's annoyed with you behind of your back,
and all those parodies you make, well they just prove you’re a hack,
and that’s just two of many reasons why you should feel crappy,
and if you can't deal with that, you don’t deserve to be happy!'
They never realize that the same mind that creates videos,
puppet shows, massive medleys, and Bender bot clothes,
can just as easily go down a dark road,
and weave a tale with such anxiety it makes me implode.
That’s the hidden curse of being a creator,
on the the outside I’m Luke, but on the inside I’m Vader,
filled with guilt and remorse for the mistakes that I made,
whether they’re from last week, or back in the 4th grade.
I can’t even count the number of times,
that instead of using energy to write funny rhymes,
I’m conjuring neurosis that would make Freud scoff,
and I would give my frontal lobe if I could just turn it off.
Write a song about my fans who are all so swell?
I know I'd leave somebody out and they’ll be hurt as Hell.
I should have got an empathectomy when I was a boy,
instead of that I’m Woody Allen crossed with Deanna Troi.
If there’s an argument, or even a chance,
it’s really best to game it out inside your head in advance,
so you can plan just what you'll say like a legal strategist,
so you can win a fight with people who don’t even exist.
This self-induced mental torture’s medieval,
it’s leaving my battered soul bare.
And I’m so worried about the baggage retrieval
system they’ve got at O’hare. It’s no fair! It’s…

Chorus 2:
NEUROTICA!… It's that manuscript your brain will create,
right when you realize you're feeling pretty great. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the prophecy that is self-fulfilled,
once all the happiness in your cranium's killed. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the mythos you constructed so gnarly,
you should just go hang out inside Arkham with Harley. It's
NEUROTICA!…

Verse 3:
This sick Spidey-sense makes me hyper-aware,
to the point where I am sensing stuff that just isn't there.
Though there never is a reason for such a thing to be,
I’ll suddenly think that one of my friends is real mad at me.
I’ll pour through my mind, and then decide that it’s Tim,
then start trying to deduce, just why I think that it’s him.
What it something I said, or I did, ’til I fear
that he’s upset because of something that happened last year.
That must be the reason, so now I’m fixated
on how i’m a jerk, justifiably hated.
Is he mad at me or not? I’ve just got to know.
So I give him a call. [*phone ring*] [Tim: Hello?]
Hey Tim, it’s Luke. [Tim: Hey. How ya doin'?]
Hangin’ in there. Got a question for you, and...
Um, well, uh, eh, it’s, you see,
just, y’know, uh… Are you mad at me?
[Tim: Mad at you? Uh… no.
Why would you think that?] Ohhh,
it’s just that thing I did last summer or fall?
[Tim: I really don’t know what you’re talking about at all.]
I was kind of a jerk and I said something rotten?
[Tim: Oh, THAT? ...I’d completely forgotten.]
So you’re not mad at me? [Tim: Not at all.] Cool, well, I
will let you go. Thanks for talking. [Tim: *sigh* Bye.] [*beep*]
I feel so much better with the whole situation
I don’t want to incite such exasperation
in my friends and my family, especially my wife.
Time to drop the whole thing and move on with my life.
But at the end of the call, he sounded kind of annoyed
when he let out that sigh, so if I want to avoid
him getting any more mad, I better call him back one more time...
[loud-whispering:] THIS IS WHAT IT’S LIKE ALL THE TIME IN MY FUCKING MIND.

Chorus 3:
It's the fairy tale you cannot avoid,
that leaves you schizophrenic via paranoid. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the yarn that puts yourself in a panic,
switching back and forth from depressive to manic. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the daydream you can't help but prepare,
that turns your hopes into a nightmare of despair. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the parable transcribed in your skull,
whose purpose is to leave you 'abby normal'. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the chronicle you're forced to transcribe,
if you can detect even one positive vibe. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the anecdote you always devise,
if there's a point when you don't have tears in your eyes. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the opus of a sensitive schmuck,
that's conjured up to make you feel shitty as fuck. It's
NEUROTICA!… It's the anxious play confessed to a friend,
done on the dubious chance, that it will come to an end.

credits

from 4th Grade Talent Show, released August 14, 2014
Sexy woman dialogue by Blythe Renay of the Damsels Of Dorkington.
Cameo by Tim Crist, a.k.a. ShoEboX of Worm Quartet.
Music by the great Luke Ski & TV's Kyle.
Final mix by TV's Kyle.

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about

the great Luke Ski Burbank, California

"the great Luke Ski" is The Dr. Demento Show's most requested artist of the 21st Century. His parodies and original songs about pop-culture have made him a favorite performer at fandom conventions all across the country. Founding member of The Funny Music Project, aka 'the FuMP' .com .

Luke Ski is an animation Storyboarder, Writer, & Voice-Over Actor.

The opinions expressed here are mine alone.
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